Broken
by AiLing
Summary: My take on what happens right after the winter finale of Grey's
1. Broken

**Broken**

Riggs, still chewing on his nuts, watched as Amelia downed her Vodka Tonic. There was something mysterious about this woman sitting beside him. She looked so melancholy, so sad, so lost, so in despair- he couldn't help but wonder why. She seemed to be hiding a deep, dark secret behind her eyes, a secret so dark that it cannot be let out, because if it was let out, it would engulf everyone around her in darkness. She looked so crestfallen, staring straight ahead of her. He was curious to know, but he didn't know if it was a good idea to prod her about it.

He finally decided that it was worth a try.

' So- do you come here often?' he asked Amelia.

' No' she replied curtly, still staring straight ahead.

Riggs is still not giving up.

' Is that your favourite drink- vodka tonic?'

' Nope' came the curt reply.

Finally taking her cue, Riggs gave up and just sat back enjoying his drink.

They both sipped on their drinks in silence for quite some time, just staring straight ahead and looking at the people entering and leaving the crowded bar.

Amelia has barely finished her glass of vodka, but she was already beginning to feel light headed. The entire bar was starting to spin, and the voices surrounding her were starting to fade away.

' You ok?' Riggs asked, noticing the change in her facial expression.

' Yes, I'm fine- I'm all fine and dandy.' Amelia suddenly found her words back. When she found her words, there is no stopping her.

" Well ok then...because you don't look so...'

' I'm fine' Amelia cut him a bit more forcefully than intended. ' I'm as fine as a girl who has nobody who freaking cares about her could be. I'm so fine- I lost my father, I lost my brother and now my boyfriend AND my sister-in-law aren't talking to me anymore- I'm FINE...' she ranted, her speech becoming more slurred, particularly at the word 'fine'.

With the vodka working its magic on her, and due to her heightened sensitivity to the drink due to the fact she hadn't had a drink in such a long time, she had lost her filter.

Riggs, now dumbfolded, remained silent.

Amelia finally lifted her eyes to look at him.

' So- tell me more about yourself' she said, smirking, her speech still slurred. ' I really want to know why Owen Hunt hates you so much. It seems like you both have some bad blood going on here. He wouldn't tell me anything, so I need you to tell me - what the hell is up with you two.'

By now, Riggs is feeling really uncomfortable with this conversation. He barely knew Amelia, and he certainly wasn't going to reveal his entire history with Owen to a person he barely knew. Besides, she seemd to be getting drunk.

He pretended to check his watch.

' Oops...It's getting late now...I gotta go' he said, pulling back his chair.

'Nice talking to you', he said as an afterthought, walking away as far from Amelia as he possibly could.

Amelia smirked to herself again. 'Way to go, Amelia' she thought to herself. ' The number one expert in chasing men away.'

Amelia raised her hand, about to catch the attention of the bartender to order another glass of vodka.

Then she changed her mind and decided she wanted something stronger instead. Something that could ease away all her pain and hurt and erase all her bad memories.

Something she had craved for ages,and almost caved in to it one year ago. Oxy.

Screw it, she would get the Oxy instead. She wondered if the junkie doctor still sells it.

She scrolled down her phone and found his contact, with difficulty as her vision was starting to blur. She started to type a text to him, but realized that her hands were now too shaky to type. She pressed call instead.

' Hello' a raspy voice answered the phone.

' Hello- it's me' Amelia said without explanation.

' You need some more?' the voice asked.

' Yes' came the short reply.

' Ok- meet me at the shop behind Joe's in 15 minutes time.'

The 15 minutes she waited for what she was desperately craving for, was the longest 15 minutes in her life. She hadn't realized that she craved oxy so much, until it was almost within her reach.

Amelia missed Oxy so much. She could feel the pulse in her veins, anticipating the entry of Oxy into her body. She could already feel the feeling of euphoria and numbness she would feel when she had Oxy in her body. She would finally feel free and blissful after what seemed like ages. She missed the feeling of not being able to feel anything.

A voice at the back of her mind reminded her that Owen would be mad at her for breaking her sober rule all at one shot today. But she didn't care anymore. To hell with it. She has already had some vodka in her system, adding in Oxy into her system wouldn't hurt. Besides, who is he to her? They both had no obligation to each other- he had no right to tell her what she could do or could not do.

She checked her watch again.

12 minutes had gone since she sent the text. It was time to make a move. She slowly made her way out of the bar- her head still spinning.

* * *

As she stepped outside the bar, the fresh cool breeze of the night air was so welcoming, she felt better almost immediately.

She walked down the dark alley, walking purposedly straight ahead. She knew that this alley was very famous for news of people especially women getting kidnapped, assaulted, robbed, or even raped, but all these were pushed to the back of her mind as she walked hurriedly towards the meeting point.

Suddenly she felt a strong arm grab her from behind and grip both her shoulders hard.

' This is it' Amelia thought bitterly. ' I am going to get raped and then brutally murdered, and someone is going to find my body chopped into a million pieces. And maybe, just maybe Owen and Meredith would bawl their eyes out.'

Still, she thought it would be worth a try to kick him hard in the balls, like what she had learnt in self-defense class and make a bolt.

She turned around to face her assailant, and gasped.

' Owen!'

' What are you doing here Amelia?' he asked more harshly than intended. But it was apparent from his facial expression that he was concerned about her.

' Nothing, just coming out from Joe's' Amelia answered casually.

' Joe's? I thought you don't go there anymore?' Amelia didn't answer, she just stared down at the pavement, not daring to look at Owen in the eye.

' Amelia, have you been drinking?' he asked.

' Have you been drinking?!' he repeated, a hint of anger in his voice when she still didn't answer.

' YES!' she finally yelled back. ' Yes, I've been drinking at Joe's, and none of what I do is any of your business. I've been sober for so long, I deserve a break'

' Amelia!' Owen cried in exasperation. ' You know it doesn't work like that! Once you relapse back you would never stop!'

' DON'T YOU DARE!' Amelia cried out, causing Owen to step back in shock. 'Don't you dare yell at me like I'm your daughter or your wife or fiance or girlfriend. None of this is your business. I don't owe you any explanation for what I do. I am a grown woman, I can do whatever I like'.

' Amelia' Owen's voice was now reduced to a whisper. He couldn't believe what Amelia was saying. There was so much hurt in her voice and her face, it is cutting deep into his soul.

' Don't Amelia me! What am I to you Owen? Am I really your girlfriend? Or just someone you climb on top of when you get horny? Because if you do regard me as your girlfriend, why do you keep on shutting me out? Why wouldn't you tell me what is wrong with you? Why wouldn't you let me help you?'

Owen was now speechless. He really didn't see this coming. Did he really just screw this up yet again? Why does he keep on screwing this up?

' Instead you go and tell Meredith everything. You confide in her but not me, why? What does she know that I don't? I see both of you talking to each other almost everyday now. It hurts, Owen- it hurts when you shut me out like that' tears were now filling Amelia's eyes. ' I opened up to you and told you all my darkest secrets, I bared my soul to you. Why wouldn't you do the same to me?'

Without saying a word, Owen pulled Amelia towards his chest in a tight hug. Amelia tried to resist, but she was just too upset and she still had the vodka in her system.

' It's getting cold out here.' he said.

He removed his jacket, and wrapped it around her shivering form.

She couldn't be more grateful for the jacket, but then she remembered she was still furious with him.

' Com'on, let's go back to my place to talk' he said, putting an arm over her shoulder as he guided her towards his car.

They both have a lot to talk about, but he was determined to sort it out with her. Because Amelia Shepherd deserved better. Maybe it was time for him to open up to her as well.


	2. Hurt

The ride home was silent. The tension in the car was so strong, you could feel it and even slice it with a knife. Owen gritted his teeth, and kept his focus on the steering wheel in front of him. Meanwhile Amelia peered out of the car window, pretending to be interested in the dark poorly lit streets outside. Owen was fuming inside, but he was driving so he had to control his temper. He didn't want the car to swerve to the side. Neither one of them uttered a single word until the car reached the trailer.

They were both so absorbed in their thoughts. Owen was tending to his hurt and anger, reeling over the fact that Amelia had relapsed, and it might be partially or even fully due to him. Meanwhile, Amelia was also furious with Owen for not leaving her the hell alone. He brushed her aside in the first place, he made it clear that he didn't want her prying in his personal life, so why should he pry into hers? She wished that she had drank more of the vodka so she could be totally drunk at not feel any emotions at the moment. But too bad, no, the few sips of vodka she took wasn't enough to wash away all the hurt and anger she was feeling inside.

The silence continued between them as they went about their chores as they reached the trailer, with Amelia taking a shower and Owen preparing some hot chocolate for them both.

Owen finally broke the silence as they were both sipping hot chocolate at the kitchen counter.

' So tell honestly me why did you do it?' Owen asked. ' Why did you go back to day One after working so damn hard to be sober for so long?'

' It's because of you' Amelia finally answered curtly, looking down at the kitchen counter.

' What do you mean it's because of me?' Owen asked- taken aback.

' You shut me out, Owen. I let you in all my darkest secrets. I open up to you about my past. I trusted you. Instead what do I get? You not even telling me a single thing , and telling Meredith instead.. So she is more important to you now, I get it.' she answered calmly in a dangerously low voice, anger laced deep in her voice.

' Amelia- I didn't mean it like that.' Owen said exasperatedly. 'I just didn't want to burden you with my personal issues...'

' So you're saying that I burden you with my personal issues when I entrust them to you?'

' No, I don't mean...'

' Alright, you made it loud and clear. From now on, I wouldn't tell you any of my personal issues anymore ok? '

'Amelia- you can always tell me anything you know. You are my friend and my confidante, you can always tell me anything that is bothering you...'

Amelia's blue eyes bore into Owen's in anger. The vodka still in her system was now causing her face to flush.

' Oh so now you're telling me that I am just your friend? Your friend and nothing more? So now you're telling me that all the sex all this while was for nothing?! That I'm just a fuck buddy for you? That is oh so comforting to hear!' she spat out furiously.

Owen scratched his head and sighed in defeat, he seemed to be saying everything wrong, he just couldn't find the right words to say to her anymore. Besides, he was dead tired and exhausted after a long shift, he couldn't think coherently anymore.

'You know what?' Amelia said suddenly. ' You go and have a nice chat with Meredith, since she is now your new best friend. Don't come to me anymore.' she said, jumping into bed and throwing the covers over herself.

* * *

 **The next morning**

' What do we have here?' Owen asked, rushing over a couple of paramedics carrying a stretcher holding a young woman with a bloodied chest.

' A 28 year old woman, found lying on the floor of her kitchen unconcious by a neighbour who heard a gunshot sound. Turned out she was shot by her husband who then disappeared' one of the paramedics explained, as they transferred her to a trolley. 'But she is still breathing and still has a pulse'.

' Hey, what's your name?' Owen asked the lady as she slowly opened her eyes to look at him.'

' O...Olivia...' she muttered softly, but loud enough for him to hear. ' He...he left me for the dead...'

Owen's anger rose at her last words... _' He left me for the dead.'_

Suddenly flashes of his painful past, snippets of the painful memories of that fateful day came rushing back to him.

' _How could you' Owen turned to Nathan, his voice suddenly full of hatred and anger towards the man he once considered his brother. ' How could you just leave her like that! She is your wife! Was….' He corrected, looking down at her lifeless form._

' _There was nothing we could do Owen.' Nathan tried to reason. ' The bullets were being fired so fast, if we tried to save her all 3 of us would be dead'_

' _You just left her!' Owen exclaimed. '_ _Olivia_ _was your wife and she was my sister and you just left her out there to die alone!'_

 _He walked away before Nathan could reply, and both of them never spoke to each other again since then._

Suddenly Owen's entire vision became blurrred. He could feel his breathing become ragged and heavier. Cold sweat trickled down the sides of his forehead, and his fist involuntarily clenched tightly, so tight that his fingers left marks on the palms of his hands.

' I'm sorry, can you call Kepner please and ask her to take over this case?' he muttered to the paramedics before striding away as fast as he could, ignoring the confused glances of the paramedics.

He walked out of the ER entrance to the feel of fresh breeze blowing at his face. Usually the feel of the breeze blowing would calm him down, but not today. He could still feel the anger and hurt of the past boiling inside of him, like a bomb waiting to explode, like a volcano waiting to erupt.

Meanwhile, Meredith Grey was about to clock out from her overnight shift. She just couldn't wait to return home and get several solid hours of sleep before she had to pick up her children from kindergarten, preschool and daycare.

She decided to drop by the ER one last time to check whether they were any pending general surgery cases that needed to be reviewed there.

All the general surgical patients had been cleared, so she walked out of the ER doors, breathing in the first feel of fresh air and freedom post shift.

She stopped on her tracks when she spotted Owen Hunt standing still a short distance away, his back facing her, staring out at the sky.

She decided to catch up on a little idle chat with him, maybe just to enjoy for a short while the cool breeze, and maybe if she was lucky, to get a bit more detail from him about his sister. When she asked him yesterday, she failed to get a reply from him. Maybe she would have better luck today.

Owen felt someone touching his left shoulder. He jumped up at the sudden contact, causing the other person to jump too and yelp in surprise. Still blinded by rage, and mad at this other person for invading into his dark personal space and erupting his volcano, he grabbed the person ( who surprisingly seemed light), by the arm and drew several hard punches to the face, until the person fell face down on the floor.

Satisfied that he had managed to release his anger and bring the other person down, Owen finally calmed down and his breathing came back to normal.

And his vision cleared.

His anger which had subsided was now being replaced by horror as he realized who he had actually beaten up and what he had done to her.

Meredith Grey was now lying face down on the concrete pavement in front of him, her limp form sprawled out, blood oozing from her forehead.

' What have I done...what have I done...what have I done' Owen muttered to himself frantically, as he paced up and down at loss of what to do. Of course, the obvious answer was to carry her straight into the OR, but when he himself was the preperator, and he wasn't thinking straight, it didn't seem like a straightfoward solution anymore.

Just then, several paramedics, nurses, interns and April rushed out of the ER towards them.

* * *

The shrill sound of Adele's 'Hello' being emitted from her cellphone caused Amelia to jerk awake on her bed. She rubbed sleep off her eyes as she tried to come to her senses. She had a throbbing headache, most probably from the vodka she consumed the night before.

Adele's voice was playing, and usually she loved the song, but not at this moment.

Groaning, she reached for her cellphone, seeing that the call was from Maggie.

'Hello' she mumbled. 'It's me' she managed to add.

Maggie's voice at the other end of the line sounded frantic and urgent.

'Amelia!' Maggie exclaimed ..' You have to come to the hospital _now'_

' Huh? ' Amelia asked, her voice still laced with sleep. ' I am off today...you woke me up..'

' I know but you have to come _now.._ it's Meredith... She has been hurt...she had been attacked by someone...Someone needs to pick her kids up today and I'm on call' Maggie rattled on.

' Maggie...Maggie...slow down please' Amelia begged. Her hungover brain still hadn't fully processed what Maggie was saying.

'Meredith has been hurt...she has been attacked...they said it was Owen...' Maggie repeated slower this time. ' Nelson is now going to operate on her, she had an intracranial bleed which needed urgent surgery.'

Amelia's dropped her cellphone on the floor accidentally in shock at the mention of Owen's name. No, not Owen. No matter how angry she was at him, she knew him too well, he would never do such a thing. No, she heard it wrongly. Or maybe Maggie had gotten the wrong information. And no, not Meredith. No matter how badly her sister-in-law treated her, even though she kicked her out of her house, she is still the mother of her brother's children.

She changed her clothes at record speed, grabbed her keys and drove as fast as she could to the hospital.

* * *

Amelia peered down from the observation gallery of OR2 at the neurosurgical team operating on her sister in law. It was confirmed that Meredith had been brutally beaten up by Owen, something which shocked the entire hospital. She was now feeling the familiar feeling of being helpless, of not being able to save a loved one. Her father was shot in front of her, James had slipped away in front of her, she was unable to save Derek, and now Meredith. Even though she knew that she wasn't supposed to operate on Meredith as Meredith was a family member, and she was off duty for the day and there was no time to lose, she couldn't help but feel that she shold be the one operating on her. Maybe she could save her sister-in-law if she operated on her. She failed to save her brother, but maybe she could save his wife. Gosh, how she hated the feeling of being helpless.

She could make out Nelson barking orders at the scrub nurses and the monitors starting to beep.

Finally she couldn't take it anymore. If Meredith dies, it would be her fault. It would be her fault that Owen had beat Meredith. Because if she had talked things out with Owen the night before, if Owen hadn't gone to bed angry, this might not have happened. She made Owen angry, and caused his anger and PTSD to flare, causing him to attack Meredith. So yes, how on earth was she going to face Zola, Bailey and Ellis when she was responsible for the death of the only parent they had left? Who would take custody of them then? She? The aunt who indirectly killed their mother? Maggie would be a better choice. But then again- Maggie would be too busy with her schedule to take good care of them. Would social services take them away?!

Before she realized it, hot tears started rolling down her cheeks. Embarrased to be caught crying, she walked out of the observation gallery and into the waiting area. She stopped on her tracks when she saw who was already there- his head buried deep in his hands.

She couldn't see his face, but she could practialy memorize his broad structure, his broad shoulders, which she used to love tracing the outline of while they were having their more intimate moments. All that now seemed like distant memories, as she continued standing rooted at her spot, and he finally looked up, sensing that she was there. Their blue eyes met, both full of hurt and unspoken words.

' I beat her' Owen muttered softly, burying his hands in his head again. ' I beat her... I didn't realize it until she was already lying bleeding on the ground... I don't know what came over me... ' he muttered, his body rocking back and forth in a gentle swaying motion.

' I know' Amelia said softly, causing Owen to look up to her again.

' I would never ever beat a woman' Owen said, his voice cracking..

'Especially not a single mother of 3 children' Amelia finished for him.

This caused Owen to resume his rocking motion.

' The monitors were beeping the last I saw' Amelia said simply. ' All we can do now is hope and pray.'

' I just couldn't help it, I couldn't control myself' Owen muttered.

' You have PTSD' Amelia said simply. ' You need help. So do I. I have an addiction to drugs and alcohol. I need help. We both need help.'

She finally sat at the other end of the room of him, making sure to keep a cautious distance between them.

They both sat in silence, her praying to the power above that her nieces and nephew wouldn't be orphans and him wondering what on earth had overtook him, and whether things would ever go back to normal for him.

After what seemed like an eternity for the both of them, the doors opened, causing them both to jump up from their positions.

Both looked like they had been through hell and back, so Nelson decided to spare them both the pain of anticipation.

' I managed to evacuate the brain bleed, Avery managed to repair her jaw and Torres managed to fix her hands. She had a jaw fracture and a radius/ulna fracture of both hands.' he went straight to the point. ' But she is stable for now.'

Both Amelia and Owen sighed collectively in relief.

' Thank you Nelson' Amelia managed to mutter.

He gave her a small sympathetic smile.

' She is now being transferred to the ICU- you can visit her there. But she isn't expected to wake up for the next few hours or so.' he said, before walking out of the room.

' Well, I am going to grab a coffee in the cafeteria and then pick up Zola and Bailey and drop them in daycare before I go to visit Meredith.' said Amelia, more to the door which closed behind Nelson, than to Owen. ' I wouldn't be going back to the trailer tonight and maybe for quite some time, I need to take care of the kids'.

' You should go home and get some rest and a shower, you look like crap' she continued, before she walked out of the waiting room door, leaving Owen still standing rooted to his spot, wondering how will things ever get back to normal between them anymore.


End file.
